And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
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After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
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Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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