Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
