How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
