dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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