Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
