You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
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