You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Too much gin, very little bucket
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
