i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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