we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have started to decorate penises.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize