dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
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