You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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