Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
