Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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