The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
He passed out mid-signature
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
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