How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You don't make any sense
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