I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
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