are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
two words...techno handjob
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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