I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Alive.
So much puke
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
