Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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