Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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