like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
is that a dick in a sweater?
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize