so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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