Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster http://tfl.nu/ubg8
  Replies (86) Good night (1032) Bad night (3753)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy. http://tfl.nu/gwon
  Replies (4) Good night (895) Bad night (2867)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  how many servings is brandon's dick?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body (508): how many servings is brandon's dick? http://tfl.nu/n1yr
  Replies (57) Good night (5238) Bad night (729)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq" http://tfl.nu/vhsj
  Replies (19) Good night (1638) Bad night (3294)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas... http://tfl.nu/m2r4
  Replies (19) Good night (6132) Bad night (903)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five http://tfl.nu/a3rp
  Replies (4) Good night (2416) Bad night (795)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed" http://tfl.nu/2s0k
  Replies (6) Good night (1096) Bad night (2655)
• Favorite

  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+64): Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking. http://tfl.nu/52no
  Replies (6) Good night (1940) Bad night (661)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that. http://tfl.nu/0566
  Replies (10) Good night (1640) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl. http://tfl.nu/70hc
  Replies (4) Good night (1627) Bad night (644)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT. http://tfl.nu/457t
  Replies (2) Good night (593) Bad night (295)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back http://tfl.nu/8xnm
  Replies (1) Good night (620) Bad night (260)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.

  (425): View more from Washington

  I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning. (425): I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation. http://tfl.nu/7xvm
  Replies (3) Good night (643) Bad night (369)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue. http://tfl.nu/xn2n
  Replies (4) Good night (1120) Bad night (252)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas http://tfl.nu/6cc4
  Replies (5) Good night (465) Bad night (218)

Randomize