we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
My liver just broke up with me...
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You need a sexual gate keeper
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
