Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
