even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
