yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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