so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
