Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
