He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize