So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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