im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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