Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
