Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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