stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
