STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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