I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
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