I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
You've changed since you got that strap on
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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