went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize