Texts From Last Night

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  (818): View more from California

  Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?

  (770): View more from Georgia

  I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.

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  (818): Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ? (770): I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no. http://tfl.nu/wmyv
  Replies (14) Good night (2030) Bad night (842)
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  (903): View more from Texas

  I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!

  (1-903): View more from Texas

  What does that even mean?

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  (903): I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude! (1-903): What does that even mean? http://tfl.nu/qhna
  Replies (30) Good night (1308) Bad night (5202)
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  (818): View more from California

  Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.

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  (818): Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works. http://tfl.nu/ca8d
  Replies (4) Good night (5793) Bad night (1475)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7

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  (313): he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7 http://tfl.nu/fzvy
  Replies (3) Good night (2341) Bad night (852)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.

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  (403): Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train. http://tfl.nu/xn8k
  Replies (16) Good night (1112) Bad night (3131)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.

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  (651): i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him. http://tfl.nu/14sr
  Replies (5) Good night (2965) Bad night (906)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment

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  (516): Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment http://tfl.nu/52np
  Replies (4) Good night (3140) Bad night (1506)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.

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  (210): It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after. http://tfl.nu/tury
  Replies (3) Good night (910) Bad night (1483)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.

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  (360): I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard. http://tfl.nu/3vju
  Replies (2) Good night (1208) Bad night (464)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.

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  (610): porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy. http://tfl.nu/gke1
  Replies (12) Good night (2453) Bad night (536)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.

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  (425): I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep. http://tfl.nu/3psv
  Replies (0) Good night (410) Bad night (333)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it

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  (443): My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it http://tfl.nu/2q57
  Replies (6) Good night (1031) Bad night (326)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.

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  (416): Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now. http://tfl.nu/rhwt
  Replies (12) Good night (327) Bad night (719)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD

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  (604): All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD http://tfl.nu/xdt2
  Replies (5) Good night (540) Bad night (290)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO

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  (713): My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO http://tfl.nu/1per
  Replies (1) Good night (655) Bad night (392)

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