3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
