Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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