Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You can't motorboat a personality
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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