I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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