don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize
