well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
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