hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
