ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
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i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
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stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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