Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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