you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
