Tell her she can't have a vagina
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize